I came from a trip to to town to find two emails and one text and one phone message, all from people that were kind, but each of the messages pushed me towards something they needed quickly. I was overcome with a sense of anxiety, frustration and a sense of, “I’ll never get ahead at this pace”—I need two of me.
But one phone call changed it all. The call from a relative that offered nothing but words of encouragement, hope and kindness. How refreshing to hear, from time to time, from a soul that offers nothing but goodness and nurturing feelings. How frail I am to be so easily brought down by the opposite! How in need I am, even now, of careful words that reaffirm me and offer me a vision of what I hope that I am becoming, and a rebuke to the devil’s attempt to convince me otherwise.
But how much my little boys must need the same—-times ten! Too often I forget that their emotional needs exceed mine! They’ve never experienced what is happening every day in their lives but for some insane reason I keep forgetting that they are little boys in need of my encouragement, compassion and explanations—-they’re sponges soaking up all things they see and hear!
What grieves me, though is what they are soaking up at school….on TV……on videos……..from the politicians…….and lately from ME. Do I press them down or lift them up with hope, a dream and a vision to go forward? Do I tire too quickly of their endless questions or, worse, do I become tired of them sometimes?
He (God) never tires of me, but the “work” that He has assigned to me as one of His children mandates that I love others as He loved me. I cannot choose to allow the annoying habits, idiosyncrasies and childishness of my children (or my friends) to cause me to give up on them or throw up my hands and walk away from them. Just as He is ever ready to hear my questions, I must put down my pen, close my computer, put up my book and listen to my sons and answer them. When it comes to working for the King of Kings, it’s not about me or my agenda, but Him and the little things (and little ones) that He has placed in my life and events that He orchestrates and permits to test my love.
He reminds me of things I should not forget; He tells me, softly and with amazing tenderness, that I do not need to worry, and that He loves me. This is how I am supposed to treat the others He has placed in my life. I stand condemned…….