God Help Me Tend to My Own Soul


Dear Friends:

I am writing this message from Mexico. We were blessed today with wonderful meetings with parents, potential campers, IAPs, and LITs and in general just a wonderful today. In addition the staff back in NC reported that all was going well, we surpassed our business goals for the week and new campers from Italy, Singapore, Bolivia, and France were applying today. Our sponsor from China told me that we could expect 80 camper spots from China! It was a good day so I somewhat expected an “attack” to follow.

And right on schedule the attack came (as it always will if we are in His service). The attack came against me personally in the most sensitive and effective manner imaginable. In short, a staff that we terminated last summer decided to tell me today what she really thought of me (albeit ten months late). Although I had nothing to do with the firing, I was the one that received the wrath. In summation I was informed that not only was I wrong to have allowed the termination, but I was also a poor excuse of a Christian — and she went into detail to explain my inadequacies. In fact, I was told that I was not a Christian according to my actions at all.

It occurred to me a few hours later that she was absolutely right. I am not a very good example of what a Christian should be and I represent what is largely wrong with the Christian faith! I don’t say this to brag about how depraved I am, but rather to admit that what is wrong with the Christian community is me. If I really am serious about the cause of Christ, I can stop pointing my boney finger at the televangelist and “sloppy agape” Christian authors, and so forth and instead admit that I am what is wrong with the message of Jesus Christ! And until I take my offenses to the cross seriously I should keep my comments about others to myself.

Speak Lord Jesus to me today and thank you for the email from this disgruntled staff.

Dean Barley


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